How to Tell a Girl You Like Her
Knowing how to tell a girl that you like her, particularly in a way that you hope that she entertain the thought of a relationship with you, is an essential skill to learn in life that will fair you incredibly well should you get it right. Although everybody is different, here is a rough guide that may be worth following.
1- Deduce whether she may have feelings for you back: How well do you know the young lady in question? Have you met before? Are you already friends? Is she a friend of a friend? When talking in absolutes, it is easier to judge someone’s attraction to you the further away emotionally you are from them. Once you’re emotionally driven towards this person, it is much harder to see through the smoke of feeling to deduce real logic. Your familiarity with your crush will also affect their familiarity with you, making them more inclined to be tactile (‘touchy feely’) but on a purely platonic (friend) basis. This can make judging their angle of interest in you very difficult. It is best to view this issue of familiarity in the wider sense of their actions with other peers: If you don’t know the lady very feel yet they she is very tactile and forward with you, is she also tactile with other people? If not, perhaps her feelings towards you are more than just platonic, if so perhaps she’s just naturally flirty.
2- Get her attention. Depending on the setting this can take many forms, but the key here is moderation. Act confidently but to not be over the top with your attention seeking. Even if you are not a very confident person, you can still ‘act’ confidently. In the first circumstance it is useful if you can get noticed without her realising that you are trying to attract her attention as, unfortunately, it is base human nature to want what you can’t have. Being slightly mysterious in the initial stages of courtship can go a long way further down the line. Wearing bright colours (“Peacocking”) is a subtle approach to this.
3- Think about the premise of the delivery. Have you two been flirting for a while (see How to flirt. https://www.mensguidetoeverything.com/how-to-flirt/ )? If they’re not expecting these words i.e. a friend or someone you haven’t met that you’ve developed feelings for, be sure to weigh out the pros and cons before telling them that you like them- is there a better way to pursue a romantic relationship with them without risking your friendship or putting them off by being too forward?
4- Find the appropriate moment: A walk in the park, or at the end of a couple of hours hanging out together for example. Do not stage the words or set a premise as this will most likely make the situation slightly awkward. The words are much better delivered on the tail end of a poignant moment that you’ve shared, even if it’s just after the end of a particularly enjoyable day together. Do not force the words if the situation isn’t right.
5- Make eye contact. Eye contact indicates sincerity, confidence, and communicates trust. Physical contact is also desirable. Don’t stare for too long however, as you may start to make the other person nervous.
6- Deliver these simple words with confidence and poise and not in a way that creates pressure “Jane/Sarah/Jodie, I like you”. Give them a few seconds to take it in, do not falter, or lose confidence. They may not answer with anything straight away so do not be worried, but after a few seconds, smile, and then carry on with what you were doing. Not having to wait for a reply will make you appear confident and attractive. If you were walking in the park for example, it might be a good idea to offer out your arm for her to link with.
7- What happens from here, for you, is entirely unknown, but surely not knowing is part of the excitement!
Be confident! Even if you’re not, act it- not in a boisterous obnoxious way, but in a quiet self-assured way.
Don’t fall into the friend zone. Whether on a night out or developing this relationship in college, if the proceedings are not carefully managed, it is far too easy to fall into the ‘friend zone’. Keep conversation fun and flirty (but not sleazy), and make subtle yet un-invasive contact whenever possible. Slight moments of discomfort and pauses in conversation are good as they keep the nature of the conversation flirtatious. In these brief moments, do not make it look like you’re trying to think of conversation, instead fill them with an action such as ordering drinks, or even making a compliment. Test the water by starting to throw out low-level “bait” i.e. subtle jokes that hint at sexual interest. A good baiting statement should be un-intrusive, playful, and fairly ambiguous. She will hopefully reciprocate with the same kind of “Baiting” so pay attention to what she says!
Make it clear through a cheeky smile (or similar) that you have understood any subtle messages of this type that she may have sent you. Wait for her to continue conversation.